Welcome to the club, moms and dads! With the announcement of a new baby’s impending arrival come so much excitement and so many questions. Who should host and plan the shower? How long do they go? What are the etiquette rules when it comes to covering the costs? Who pays for a baby shower?
This article will help you decipher traditional etiquette rules of cost, find out what is trending today, and help you choose the right arrangement for your situation and who might be paying. Most importantly, get ready to have a fantastic time at your baby shower. We have hosted thousands of showers, and who pays might surprise you!
Traditional etiquette rules
Many parents want to respect traditional etiquette rules when it comes to their baby shower. They may feel that their guests expect and appreciate this. When the guests will span multiple generations, it can be helpful to have a set of “rules” to follow that will conform to these expectations.
Traditionally for an in-person shower, a friend or relative hosts the baby shower and pays for the costs. But this is changing fast!
Generally, the expecting mom is kept free of the traditional baby shower, but honestly, this is not really common now. But if that’s your game for sure check out our baby shower checklist.
Who’s the Host?
It is appropriate for a friend or more distant relative, such as a cousin or aunt, to act as the host. The main rule is that the parents-to-be do not host, as it can be interpreted as throwing themselves a party and asking for gifts.
Upending the rules for a modern baby shower
It’s also okay to throw the traditional etiquette “rules” out the window. Every family is different and has their own comfort level about paying for things such as baby showers.
Old baby shower rules are based on in person events at a resturant or home, who pays is not really relevant online, but who ‘runs’ it might be in your social group.
Grandparents are often the ones to throw the event so they may want to pay for it, too. This allows them to throw the event that they dream of for their new little grandchild without having to consult a shared budget. Parents.com states that close family members, such as “a sister, mother-in-law, or even the guest-of-honor’s mother” are throwing baby showers more often today.
If the parents-to-be are the ones who want to pay for the shower, whether they plan the event or not, that’s also perfectly okay!
Friends and extended family may want to assist the host in throwing the baby shower. It is okay to talk to these people about helping out financially. This can take some of the financial burden off of the host as well as give others the chance to be involved.
Help is Welcome
Some people even prefer to assist in the cost of the shower rather than buy a gift that the parents may not even want or need. This can come in the form of money given to the host to assist in their plan or taking one of the tasks, such as party favors or the food, off of the host’s plate financially and in execution.
Virtual baby showers are different
If you are planning a shower that spans the country or even the globe, a virtual gathering might be the perfect solution. With a virtual shower, you have increased flexibility when it comes to the etiquette of paying for the event.
The online shower is setup to have guests participate in a variety of ways, such as signing a guest book, leaving messages for the parents-to-be, or participating in live calls. It becomes less important who is footing the bill and more about getting to connect with friends and family separated by distance.
It might surprise you, but here at WebBabyShower 60% of virtual baby showers are paid for by the new grandparents, while the remaining 40% are paid for by the expectant parents or a close friend. This arrangement makes a lot of sense for this type of event.
An Online Shower is Inexpensive
A virtual shower is a great way to the guest-of-honor’s community of loved ones to connect; it is appropriate that the guest-of-honor or a close family member to facilitate this outpouring of love. When the virtual shower includes an in-person gathering or two, as well, it works out well for a host to pay for that gathering or for those attending to contribute to the celebration. Lanielou00 shared on What To Expect’s message board for everyone to “focus on the celebration!” What a great way to welcome a new baby to the world!
Remember it’s a Party!
Whether you choose to follow the traditional etiquette rules or find a more modern arrangement, the important thing to remember is to have fun at your baby shower. Celebrating the arrival of a new baby is a fun and festive event. Spending time with friends and family is a great chance to shower the parents-to-be with love and get everything ready for the new little one. Check out this article for everything you need to know about virtual baby shower etiquette. Welcome baby!