Baby Shower Etiquette for Guests & Hosts – Easy Guide 2024!

A baby and a new pregnancy come with lots of questions for both parents and host. Questions about baby shower etiquette are usually among the first that you will face. But you shouldn’t let adherence to outdated etiquette get in the way of throwing an awesome, inclusive baby shower

Fortunately for you, things have changed in the baby shower world, it’s 2023 and the modern parent has lots of options!

There are about a million ways to be a great parent and just as many variations on throwing a great virtual baby shower. And as experts who have hosted thousands of baby showers, you can be sure that our advice on shower etiquette is tried and true. This handy guide will help you navigate the new, modern rules to creating a fun baby shower everyone is sure to love. Our article provides information and etiquette rules like who pays, how long they should be, what is the average number of guests and all the rest (but if you’re looking for an alternative to a baby shower here are 9 ideas).

Skip Ahead to our Individual Tips for the Guest of Honor

online baby shower ideas

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Baby Shower Etiquette Tips for the Guest of Honor

Baby showers are a lot of fun. But, with that fun comes anxiety, especially regarding baby shower etiquette. Who should you invite? Is it ok to ask for gifts? Who hosts the baby shower?

If these questions keep you up at night, don’t worry. We’ve got you covered. This article will give practical baby shower etiquette tips to calm your anxiety and ensure your guests have a fantastic time. By the time you’ve finished reading, you’ll have all the tools you need to have the baby shower of your dreams.

Who Throws the Baby Shower?

Classic baby shower etiquette rules state that a close family member or friend should be the baby shower host. And this is good advice. While you don’t have to be related to the person, ensure it’s someone close.

If no one has offered to host yet, it’s ok to ask someone to throw you a little soiree. They may have not offered yet because they assumed someone else was hosting. So, it never hurts to ask.

Ask someone you feel really comfortable with – like a close childhood friend, a beloved co-worker, or your favorite aunt. It’s okay if the person you ask falls outside the “typical” best friend or close-relative category.

When Should the Baby Shower be Held?

Traditional: There are a few things to think about when selecting a date for your baby shower. You want to be far enough in your pregnancy to enjoy baby-themed treats, sharing names, and games. Many parents wait until they find out the gender of their baby so that they can incorporate it into the baby shower theme. But, you also need to consider how comfortable you will feel at the end of your pregnancy. Shutterfly recommends having a baby shower sometime between the sixth and eighth month of pregnancy.

Modern: A virtual baby shower is typically ‘held’ over the course of a few weeks and offers incredible timing flexibility. This allows for maximum participation from guests, as they can sign in to leave a heartfelt message, play games, or share photos throughout the duration of the shower. You can incorporate a zoom baby shower with an in-person no problem.

This is typically a much easier way to get around the problem of scheduling conflicts, as so many people these days have very tight schedules. This creates a more welcoming environment for both the host, the gift giver, and the guest. If people aren’t able to make the live event, they can still show their support, or offer a baby gift at their own convenience.

Baby Shower Guest List– Who to Invite?

Do you have lots of friends and family? Are you worried about who you should invite and who won’t make the cut? Don’t stress, and invite your whole crew! If you want to invite over 40 people, consider having two smaller baby showers to keep things more manageable.

For more advice on who you should ask, check out this article.

Baby Shower Registry Guide for Gifts

Online registries are a new mandatory part of celebrations. If you’re undecided, check out our article on the best baby shower registries including universal ones, which might surprise you.

Critics argue registries are akin to asking for gifts. But remember a baby shower is designed to shower mom and dad with love and help them prepare for a baby. The vast majority of your friends and family appreciate being directed to a specific registry list of what gifts will help the parents-to-be the most.

Registries also make it easy to ship gifts directly to the recipient, something that most people will appreciate. Parents.com recommends including registry information somewhere other than the invitation and not pressuring anyone to only use the registry when selecting a gift. webbabyshower.com makes this easy as we have a dedicated page just for Gift registries!

Registries are also a practical tool for parents-to-be to use. Many have suggested registry lists of gifts that will help parents make sure they are prepared for the baby’s arrival. Most offer discounts on items and gifts that are left on the list; this can be a huge financial help to parents-to-be who may still need essential baby gear and gifts off the registry after their shower is complete.

So next time you are hesitant about whether or not to include a registry for gifts, remember that it actually makes things more convenient for your guests. If you worry that you are asking too much, consider opening up your registry to some more inexpensive options.WebBabyShower has the option to add any online gift registry you want to your virtual shower or remove them completely. Looking for the most popular baby shower gifts, we’ve got that covered with real-life examples of registry items.

Baby Shower Gift Etiquette: Opening Gifts at the Party

Baby clothes and gifts are just the cutest! Everyone loves to see the adorable onesies, tiny socks, and little toys. Should you plan on opening the gifts at the party for everyone to fawn over? It depends, lets get into your baby shower gift etiquette questions.

If your shower is a small or even medium-sized affair, mom should go ahead and open presents if that’s how you want to celebrate. For large groups, unwrapping presents at the actual shower may present a logistics challenge for both the expectant mom and the host, and some people choose not to open gifts at the baby shower. If you are hosting a virtual baby shower, opening presents is still possible and oh-so-much fun. Ask guests who want to send gifts to do so ahead of the event to shower the mother-to-be with love and gifts, with the instructions to wait to open them until the live event. You will love the anticipation that builds!

friends giving gifts on baby shower

Etiquette for the Baby Shower Host

Being the best baby shower host comes with its own rules and social conventions. Let’s take a look at some of the more important elements baby shower etiquette for the person hosting the shower.

Favor-Giving Etiquette

Don’t feel pressured to give your baby shower guests a party favor. If you’re on a tight budget, it’s okay to just send a sweet card thanking them for their attendance.

If you choose to give favors to your guests, consider selecting ones that match the baby shower theme. For example, if the baby shower is bear-themed, you could give little jars of honey from your local farmer’s market. Or, if you’re hosting an outdoor baby shower, you could give tiny succulents.

If several guests are flying in for the event, avoid getting party favors they can’t take in their carry-on, such as oversized liquids or gel candles.

Want more terrific gift ideas? Check out this article.

RSVP 101

Traditional: Hosting a baby shower? You should expect to get the RSVPs from guests. Make sure to provide your contact info, whether phone, email, or both, to make it easy for guests to let you know if they are able to attend. Virtual baby showers or showers using electronic invitations make it easy for guests to mark if they plan on attending. It also makes it easy for you as the host to keep track of who to expect. While you can use services like Evite, Minted, or Paperless Post they will push you to upgrade to paid options and designs. We have over 100 designs of matching invites and websites, and invites are unlimited with our base plan.

Modern: Baby Shower RSVP sending is built right into the system, you can send great designs right from your account with our email tracking feature, or use your personal email, it’s super easy and completely up to you.

Baby Shower Invitations

Traditional: Invitations are the first thing that your guests will see about your shower and offer the perfect chance to set the tone for a fun and festive event. You can choose to send paper invitations, electronic invites, or a hybrid. If you want to mail paper, but create it online, sites like Postable allow you to select your cards online then mail for you.

Need some inspiration for just what to write in your invitations? Check out our guide for more information on the perfect baby shower invitation wording.

Modern: Baby Shower RSVP and invitations are all wrapped into one service, though you’ll still be in charge of your baby shower invite wording if you want to get flowery. (we tend to go with ‘Having a Party!’ lol). Basically, your shower invitation is as simple or creative as you want!

Want to know when guests are participating in games, uploading pics or videos? You can get alerts for that as well.

When Should I Send the Baby Shower Invitations?

Traditional: When to send baby shower invites? We recommend sending out your invitations four weeks in advance of the event, Thebump.com does as well. One month allows guests enough time to make plans to attend and is a guide to when the baby shower invites go out. If you’re wondering when to have a baby shower, we’ve got you covered. Then, just walk the invite send the date back from there.

Modern: A web baby shower can be a little bit more flexible, as guests are able to log in over the span of days or weeks to participate. However, keep in mind the response to email invites is often immediate! So send them when you are ready, not ‘about to be ready’. Any event with a live portion, whether in-person or virtual, should include invitations sent out with enough notice for guests.

Food and Drinks at Baby Showers

Food and drinks are a great place to showcase your baby shower theme. Whether you serve light bites or a full meal, let your creativity shine through with unique recipes! Delish.com has great recipes for appetizers that your guests are sure to love while they mingle and enjoy the party. Not sure if you should serve alcohol at a baby shower? If that’s something that your guests will enjoy, go for it! Just make sure to include a few tasty mocktail recipes for those not indulging and you are sure to have a great time.

Should I Choose a Theme?

Traditional: This is entirely up to you and the parent(s) you are hosting for; consider what is fun for you and for mom to put together. If you’re having fun, so will your guests. Popular theme choices include jungle themes, safari animals, and, of course, elephants! If you’d like to use a theme but aren’t sure where to start, you can purchase a package that has all of the things you may want and need– such as decorations, plates, and games.

If you’re not into themes, don’t feel like you have to force it. As long as you have a fun environment full of love, your party is sure to be a hit.

Modern: Themes are alive and well and easy to edit. No standing on ladders required!

Baby Shower Games

Many of your party-goers will expect to play some games at the shower. But don’t feel that you are limited to the “traditional” baby shower games if they don’t seem fun to you and you don’t want to play them. Any party game, such as charades or trivia, can be given a special “baby” spin. Fit Pregnancy has a list of fun games guaranteed to have your guests laughing. And we’ve got some printable games to get you started.

Make sure you check with the mom-to-be about what types of games she would like to play. Not all pregnant women appreciate guests using string to guess how big their belly has become or guessing baby names. Just like with most aspects of a baby shower, the most important rule of etiquette to follow when it comes to games is to have fun!

WebBabyShower has six ready-to-play games on the platform, you can toggle these on and off too if you want everyone playing the same game at the same time or extending your shower for days. WebBabyShower also has fourteen printable games ready for you to play along with six interactive slideshow games perfect for in-person and virtual events.

webbabyshower image from insta baby shower guests chatting and playing games
Image from: @marsandcrew

Thank You Notes

Thank you cards are always important, whether virtual or paper it’s key to make sure friends and family members know that you appreciated their attendance especially if they live far away. Thank you notes can be simple but we suggest you make them personal and mention any baby gear or gifts the recipient may have given you. Stuck on what to say?  Check out our thank-you card examples here.

Baby Shower Guide for Guests: 4 Things Not to Do!

It’s all well and good learning how to behave at a baby showr and what sorts of things guests should do – but what about the things you shouldn’t do? What social faux pas should baby shower guests be aware of – in order to maintain good baby shower etiquette?

Let’s take a look at four important things you definitely should NOT do at a baby shower.

Resist The Urge to Rub That Belly!

One of the most awkward and frustration-inducing scenarios for an expectant mother is the unwanted belly rub. Maybe she’s self-conscious or not feeling well; maybe she’s just plain uncomfortable during her pregnancy and does not want to be touched. No matter the reason, take care and assume that the expecting mom would rather not be touched unless she invites you. The same goes for comments about the size of her belly, including any that compare her to a large animal, no matter how cute. Trust us on this piece of etiquette advice, if you don’t believe us, just check out our pregnancy shaming interviews, we asked real-life moms about these issues!

No Breastfeeding Talk

Planning on nursing? Formula? On-demand? Mom-to-be has probably thought through all of these things, but that doesn’t mean she knows the answer. The reality is that it will depend on a lot of factors and information that she may not know yet, including her delivery, her health, the needs of her baby, and her own needs.

If she wants to share her thoughts on the subject, listen as a friend and supporter. If expectant parents want to share, they will. Otherwise, take our etiquette advice and just let their personal choices remain personal.

Don’t Ask About Plans for Siblings

Many people may be curious about mom and dad’s plans to expand their already growing family. It’s such a fun thought to imagine little tots running around. But it may be something that the new family doesn’t have planned out yet. Most parents, especially first-time parents, are probably just getting ready to welcome one new bundle into their lives. Let mom and dad take it one baby at a time.

No Unsolicited Parenting Advice, Please

If you’re a parent now, remember the feeling you had when you were about to be one? Excitement, fear, general overload? One of the most basic rules of etiquette is that offering unsolicited parenting advice is a general no-no but is especially unwelcome at a baby shower, it’s a party, not a stress-fest. Even WebMD warns others against giving parenting or pregnancy advice before they are asked.

If mom or dad asks for advice, feel free to give it. But be wary of overloading them with all kinds of scenarios, information, and advice that they may not want. Every baby is different and every parent has to make their own decisions regarding their parenting choices. The best thing you can do is shower everyone with love and support.

webbabyshower mom chatting with friends at baby shower party with little foods and drinks

Baby Shower Etiquette for the Mom-to-be

We’ve covered baby shower etiquette for guests and hosts, so now let’s take a look at some simple rules for the mom-to-be. If you’re expecting, follow these simple baby shower etiquette tips to ensure your event goes off without a hitch!

Don’t Try to Take Control (Leave the Hosting to the Host)

You want your baby shower to go perfectly. Trust us. We get it. But try to relinquish control and trust that the person who offered to throw your shower has got it covered.

Feel free to jump in if the host asks you to help with something. Or, during the planning stages, you can offer to bring a food item or a little gift for the guests. But, beyond that, try to sit back, relax, and enjoy the moment. If there was ever a time to be pampered – this is it!

The More Baby Shower Offers, The Better

It’s perfectly ok etiquette-wise for you to accept multiple baby shower offers. So, if your mom and best friend want to throw you a baby shower, don’t feel you have to turn one of them down. Sometimes, multiple baby showers may be ideal if you have different friend groups or would prefer a more intimate setting, allowing for more quality time with your loved ones.

Complete Your Registry Ahead of Time

Try to finish your baby shower registry at least a few weeks before your baby shower. This way, your guests have plenty of time to select, buy, and wrap your gifts before the big day. If you post at the last minute, you might end up with duplicates or things you didn’t want or need.

Be a Social Butterfly

If you have a large baby shower with friends and family who don’t know each, make some introductions. This will make everyone feel more comfortable, ensuring all of your guests have a fantastic time! Try to talk to everyone at your shower – at least for a moment – to let them know that their presence is appreciated. They will love getting to spend a little quality time with the mom-to-be!

webbabyshower team chelsea nelthropp

Chelsea previously worked with special needs children before transitioning to her current passion, freelance writing. She’s written on a plethora of topics and enjoys the diversity of her work. In her free time, Chelsea enjoys hiking, creating artwork, and reading true crime.

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